Errata is a web journal written by Robert Davis who has neither spent a night in a ghost town nor pulled a turnip from the earth. He doesn't even know if turnips grow in the ground. Perhaps on trees, like candy corn. Therefore, Errata is a non-commercial project.

Observation #1: It may be appropriate, when leaving a movie theater, to say "mysterious."

Observation #2: It may be appropriate, when leaving a movie theater, to say "mysterious" at the top of your lungs. Bring your eyebrows together before you say it. Effective!

Observation #3: Same for books. Even at libraries.

There is a prize for people who correctly guess the thing about Metropolis, Nevada.

Except where the text specifically states otherwise, Errata's vagaries are indicated vaguely and its authors are indistinct in the traditional way of the Internet, except where the authors lay claim to their work. In some cases Robert Davis lays claim to work that is not his own but has been abandoned like so many ghost towns. Except where held presently, fistfuls of dirt are suspended via dispersal, or dispersed via suspension (in the air), and thus their dissolution is their transcendence, or their transcendence is their dissolution. And yet our eyes tear, and our vision is impaired, demonstrating for the umpteenth time that one entity's gain is another's fit of sneezes. Except where indicated, storms shall outlive the clay upon which they rain, unless storms are improperly delimited by their clouds, which dissolve, rather than by their inevitable return. Thus the clay loses, unless the clay is said to own the storm, to use it to make itself heavy, to make itself cling to white garments, refuse dispersal, cake upon the facades of abandoned buildings, and sit like Man [sic] upon the earth where it is pelted by a storm that it owns. In which case the clay still loses, if you ask us.

Some of the above is legally binding and should be considered a mental contract between Errata and those upon whom it acts. The bit about the prize should be considered an overstatement insofar as prizes differ from dirt and prize dispersal differs from dirt dispersal. Please recall that ownership is a weight and, therefore, hope that you do not win the prize.

One day Errata or its representatives will call upon you for a favor. It is expected that you will hop-to without delay.

You may contact Robert Davis by email unless it's about the rock that was thrown in anger. The rock is more properly called a clod. Why do you continue to raise the topic?

6 October 2006

Errata Ends Daily Updates

Other Corrections

Fifteen Months Ago

We were told that a blog should be updated every day or readers would drift. Freshness is critical, our advisors said, and since we do aim to be critical we heeded their advice, even though they commanded fees in excess of what might be deemed reasonable. At their urging, we instituted a new plan whereby one item would be deleted from this site each day. The message to the reader was clear: check back regularly to see which item was removed.

Or So We Thought

At first we dismissed the emails that asked us about the very freshness we had so recently embraced. Where are the updates? readers would ask. Look. The post about the McSweeney's mural: gone. But the emails persisted long after the scheme went into effect, like the spitefully-trained talking bird who will not pipe down about the cracker and who could easily be hushed with a maneuver similar to the one used to bring a ketchup bottle to bear against an intruder's noggin: a grasp 'round the neck and a whip overhead, blackjack-style. Will you please be quiet please?

However

We have come to suspect that the problem is not with the ketchup-bottle-blackjack-bird but with the intruder's noggin, or more specifically with the advice that spills so easily out of it. Also his lack of crackers. Rather than waste hard-won money on a sixteenth month of service from our as yet unproven advisors, we are terminating their retainer very soon — ok, yes, immediately — and reversing the freshness agenda forthwith. No more daily deletions. Damn their oily hides.

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